philosophy 101

philosophy 101 as in basic basic philosophy, I'm really not much of a philosopher but here is my question for today>>



SO

I know we have to experience pain, to experience pleasure (if life were all good we wouldn't know it was "good" it would be more a plateau, we feel joy, happiness, pleasure and know it is "good" because of the comparison with the times when we feel sadness, pain.) BUT -why must the pain (physical or emotional) we experience (potentially) reach such extremes? If we only knew minor pain, it would still be enough to enhance the pleasurable times. Pain is relative to our own lives and experience. If you have recently lost a loved one, failing a test will not seem like the worst thing in the world, however if failing is the worst thing that has ever happened to you it will seem like a pretty big deal, and you'll probably feel a lot worse about it than the bereaved person. So I don't understand why we have to experience such heavy depressions and moments of really awful luck.
Here endeth the incoherent rant.